Succotash: Technicolor Dreamcoat

"We begin to find and become ourselves when we notice how we are already found, already truly, entirely, wildly, messily, marvelously who we were born to be.”
— Anne Lamott

I am an individual. I am unique. I am me. These words, these phrases, so easy to put on paper, but to actually mean them is difficult. It's funny, looking back and reflecting on myself as a young child, I never put much thought into "being different", and trying desperately to have a sense of individualism. I was just me, a young, fun, light hearted kid who loved to talk and socialize. And then, as time moved forward, I, along with most children my age, became much more conscious of who I was, where I stood, what I looked like, what I believed. These thoughts, all part of growing and being, can be taken in so many different directions. Some children, take these thoughts, move into their natural process of getting older and cozy up easily to it. Like a perfect puzzle piece, nestling in right next to where it belongs. Although they think about where they stand and who they are, it's not something that consumes them, it just happens naturally. Unfortuantely, for me, it hasn't happened that way. Why? Well, I will admit, yes, I am a free spirit, and taking on that role tends to lead to a bit of chaos and jumbled direction. I will also admit that my decision making on occasion can be a bit....hmmm how do you say it......reactionary??? Aka.....I might, just might, not always think through things before I do them. Now, with this being said, I personally feel that these qualities are good, bad and a little in between. The good is, I have lived. I truly have. I look back on the people I have met, the places I have lived, visited, i'm proud of it. I'm proud of the life i've seen, the beauty, i'm even proud of the lonlienss I have felt while out there. I know it defined me. But then, there comes the bad with that gypsy soul of mine. I am never satisfied. I am in a constant state of what can I do, where can I go, what can I see, who can I be?? You could characterize these questions as a person feeling extremely lost, with no solid base, no where to call themselves "just me". I realize this about myself. I know that the search for who I am, where I stand, what defines me will be a on going battle, probably for my entire life. I realize, as many have, who suffer from this form of wanderlust, to take this search in stride. Take time to figure out what turns me on, what makes me feel. Taking time is difficult for the dreamer. We see, there for we are, and unfortunatley seeing and patiently waiting, thinking, evaluating can seem so stagnent. I know it's what I need to do, and what I have been doing. But, in this beautiful life, I must find my passion. Find me. Turn it in to a career. Take ownership of my dream. I love the creative aspect of this world and what individuals can do with it. How exciting isn't it? I ask you, have you ever just sat back and thought about all the creativity that circulates in this world? All the magnificent ideas in their different forms. It's a phenomenon that i still have trouble wrapping my head around. I want to be a part of it. Find myself in it, and eventually live it. I hope hope I can. I know "me" is there. I know I am truly starting to find myself, my individual, my "I". Thanks for reading this mumbo jumbo.

Now, time for some color inspiration and a few people who seem to have found their own individual, fabulous, creative selves.